It's basically a proven fact the way to make the most money in life is to bet on a sure thing. Yeah some idiots will say hard work and determination do it but those people are dead broke. Tonight's NFL season opener is one of those sure things.
The Carolina Panthers are just 3 point favorites tonight when they face off against the Denver Broncos, the team who crushed their Super Bowl hopes with every Von Miller sack last season.
Now you may ask yourself "well why would I bet on the Panthers when they got smoked in the Super Bowl by the Broncos?" and it's a valid question.
You bet heavily on the Panthers because of:
A) Revenge factor
B) Defending champs always have a Super Bowl hangover the next season
C) Cam Newton is the returning NFL MVP and wants the world back on his side
D) Kelvin Benjamin is back for Carolina and should have a big game
E) Von Miller will probably either be drunk or high or both because he just won a Super Bowl MVP
F) Because I fucking said so.
So throw your mortgage, your kids tuition, your beer money, your car payment, your ramen noodle spare change all in for the Panthers tonight.
-3 Carolina is the bet. Thank me later by buying a shitload of shirts!